When you first got together, you and your partner couldn’t keep your hands off each other. You’d spend all weekend in bed, reluctantly leaving to arrive late to a social commitment you couldn’t come up with an excuse for skipping. Flash forward a year or two, and now the only action you seem to get is from the colorful collection of vibrating friends sitting in your bedside drawer. The reality is, relationships typically change once the honeymoon period is over. As you become more comfortable with each other, you may not feel the need to prioritize your relationship in the same way you did in the beginning, and the amount of I-need-you-right-now sex you two have may decrease a bit. But what do you do if you suddenly find yourself in a totally sexless relationship?
According to Dr. Dana McNeil, licensed marriage and family therapist, a sexless relationship is a situation in which the lack of sex is a problem for at least one partner. It may cause emotional distress, insecurity, or an overall dissatisfaction with the relationship as a whole.
For most people, sexual satisfaction is important to the health of a long-term relationship, but often, the biggest issue isn’t the lack of sex itself, it’s the fact that it isn’t being acknowledged. “Many partners, innocently enough, try to minimize the problem or dismiss the issue because they don’t know how to handle it or are embarrassed,” McNeil says. “This will backfire every time.” If you’re feeling some discontent in this area, here are a few tips for how to move forward, and hopefully, get back to having spicy sex on the regular.
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